Have you ever described something you disliked intensely by
saying “I’d rather stick needles in my eye”?
I have many times and in the last few days I have had exactly that
done. Surprisingly it didn’t hurt and I
was expecting it to hurt more than anything I could imagine. Who knew?
But I’m getting ahead of myself here.
This all started a couple of weeks ago, no that’s not quite
right, it started many years ago. As a
kid my eyesight was perfect, but then suddenly in Grade 11, I discovered I
needed glasses. I was near-sighted and
discovered this when I was sitting in the front row of the class and could not
read the blackboard. So I got
glasses. This almost came back to haunt
me a few years later.
At 19 I applied to the Vancouver Police Department after
spending the past 14 months in the Police Reserves. When it came to the medical testing, I just
barely failed the vision test. Two thing
conspired to let me in. One was the
massive number of recruits needed and the other was my good record as a Reserve
Constable. However, I had to get contact
lenses. This was when soft contacts
first came out. It took me two hours on
the morning of the first day of the academy to get them in my eyes.
After about 5 years on the job, I abandoned the contacts and
went back to glasses. Suddenly after
about 20 years, I went back to contacts.
They drove my eyes crazy and with 2 years left in my career, I took the
big step to have laser surgery. I went
from 20/50 to 20/10, the eyes of a fighter pilot they said. It was so awesome and I marveled at my
newfound eyesight every day.
Everything was perfect until a couple of weeks ago, when I
suddenly noticed a blurry area, a shadow that looked like a cloud and lots of
those black floaty things. I figured
they would go away, but they didn’t. I was
due for an eye checkup anyway. Since the
surgery I have religiously gotten my eyes checked about every 5 years and so I
booked an appointment.
Everything was going along perfectly. My eyesight was checking out great and I
ordered some custom reading glasses. On
the pressure test for glaucoma, I had a reading between 9 and 12 which is
excellent. Anything over 25 is
dangerous. I had the final consult with the
eye doctor, who ordered a second set of photos of the inside of my eyes because
he was concerned about something, but didn’t say more. We did the shots and he put them up on the
screen and then pointed out an area and gave me the shocking news. “You have a tear in your retina”, he
said. We’ll book you a spot in the
surgical center and call you.
Knowing how the wait lists are, I figured this would take
place weeks, or even months down the road.
The next morning, I got a phone call telling me to report to the eye
center in Vancouver at 1:00 PM. Holy
cow, was that fast and that is when the whirlwind began.
I went through a series of tests and 3 different types of
photos on my eyes and the news I got was even more shocking than what I had
received the day before. I not only had
a torn retina, it had become partially detached as well. He told me that the tear had allowed some
fluid to get behind the retina and caused it to detach from the back wall of my
eye.
He then explained a new procedure that they do and that is
to inject an air bubble into the eye. He
warned me that it only works about 70% of the time and carrier with it a risk
of infection. Again, I figured this
would be several days away, but again I was wrong. It was happening now! I was sent to sit in the waiting room.
I admit it though; I was scared spitless about having
needles in my eye. I knew, or thought I
did, how much this would hurt. Now
whenever I am scared or nervous, I pace, and so I did, up and down the
hall. My Fitbit showed I did 5,000 steps
while I was waiting. Then the call came
and off I went.
They put yet another set of drops in my eye and then came
the needle to “freeze” the eye. I tensed
waiting for the intense pain and it didn’t happen. In seconds, that one was over. I had to wait a few seconds for it to take
effect and then he stuck a second needle in my eye to remove some fluid. As he explained, they had to make room for
the bubble. Then they injected the
bubble and he drew an arrow on my forehead with a Sharpie.
 |
| ARROW HEAD |
I had to keep the arrow pointed straight up and so it meant
keeping my head cocked at a strange angle.
My neck began to hurt more than the injections had. The purpose of this was to keep the bubble
centered over the detachment. This would
press my retina against the back wall of my eye and hopefully it would
attach. If it didn’t it would mean
conventional surgery where they open my eye and repair it that way. Renee drove me home.
The disconcerting thing was that I can actually see the
bubble on the inside of my eye and it is annoying as hell. Even with a bandage over my eye, I can see
it. But my vision in the right eye was
crystal clear and I drove to the clinic the next day. I discovered that I can drive better with one
eye closed than 70% of the drivers in Vancouver.
Twenty-four hours later, on a Saturday at 4:00 PM I was back
in the chair. Again I had needles in my
eye to freeze it, and because I take daily aspirin, it bled a lot more than it
should have. The Doctor then looked and
was very impressed with the result. My
retina had adhered so well; it was hard to even see the tear.
He began to laser the inside of my eye, essentially spot
welding the retina in place and closing the tear. Every so often he would hit a nerve and the
pain would shoot through to the back of my head, but they were minor and over
quick. After about 40 minutes, I was on
my way home.
 |
| ZOMBIE EYE |
The next day, I was able to take the bandage off and I am
able to see clearly again. I think it
was successful. Well, clearly except for
the damn bubble. I can see perfectly
over top of it, but looking down my vision is obstructed. Two days later I was back in the vision
center and was told that the surgery was a complete success and I had achieved an
“outstanding” result. My vision is back
to 20/10 and perfectly clear. Well,
clear except for the damn bubble.
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